Whoa, My Dog Is Teaching Me The Meaning Of Life

/ Stuart Danker

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Let me introduce you to Lady, a ten-year-old cocker who’s been my buddy for a while now. Before meeting her, I often viewed dogs as simple beings that chased after balls and bothered people while they eat.

However, Lady has taught me more about life than any self-help guru ever could. She doesn’t read motivational books or have a master’s degree in psychology. Yet somehow she still manages to teach me valuable life lessons.

Here are some of them.

1. Find your passion and let it kill you

Let’s start with Lady’s prime directive in life: food. When it comes to that, she’s a hustler of the highest order.

She could’ve just thrown up from an upset stomach, but offer her food and she’ll find a way to gulp it down. If anyone dares ‘invade’ our home, she’ll be the first to hate on that stranger. Yet offer her a dog biscuit and voila, they’re BFFs.

Even the realm of dreams can’t hold her back. She’ll be twitching and dreaming about whatever dogs dream about, but the moment I open my refrigerator, she’ll be at my heels, awake as ever.

I’m telling you, she’ll sell her soul (sacrificial goats, anyone?) for one tiny dog treat. That’s all it takes to get her to let go of all her values and beliefs.

But she’s taught me what passion is. I’ve always admired people who pursue their goals with a single-minded tenacity. And Lady’s the doggo version of that.

If I only had half the enthusiasm she shares for food, I’d be so much more successful than I am right now.

Lady looking intently at an apple

Will do anything for food

2. The meaning of unconditional love

Honestly, I think Lady’s understanding of love should be researched by scientists. I’ve accidentally stubbed her, sometimes forgotten her dinner, and yet, she still loves me like I’m the last human on earth.

She doesn’t hold grudges or write lengthy posts about it on her blog. She just goes on loving me for who I am—a mostly reliable food-giver who occasionally kicks her in the dark.

Often in life, we show love in hopes of getting something in return. That could be something as selfish as lust, to more material gains like money. I’ve certainly loved conditionally many times over.

But all Lady has to do is curl up in my lap—despite all my shortcomings—and I’m reminded just what it means to love someone unconditionally.

Lady sitting against me

Guarding me when I’m meditating

3. Live in the moment

Lady’s attitude towards life has also helped me appreciate the present moment. For Lady, every walk is an adventure, regardless of the number of times we’ve walked down the same path.

She still sniffs at the same blade of grass like she didn’t just spend five minutes doing the same thing the day before. And she keeps barking at the same traffic cone even though it never harmed her once. We’ve passed that cone more than a hundred times now.

But does she care? No! Yesterday’s issues don’t matter, and tomorrow is a lifetime away.

Isn’t that true, though? Think about all the worries we used to have in the past. And yet, here we are, still alive. You, still reading a random Malaysian’s blog post. Me, still writing random blog posts.

Maybe living in the moment is something to strive for, after all.

Lady

Just Lady doing doggo things

4. A 1% chance is still a chance

Lady’s relentless optimism is something to behold, too. Every time I chop the vegetables, she’ll be perched between my feet, ever hopeful for that rare cucumber drop.

Sure, the odds of that happening are slim—like one in a hundred. But don’t tell her that. It’s not like she cares anyway. She’s a hustler, remember?

Here’s the thing, though. Food does drop from time to time. And it’s not out of pity either. Every time that happens, she’ll be in the perfect position to seize that opportunity.

So every time you find yourself dismissing an idea because there’s a ‘low chance’ of something good happening, you remember Lady and the hundreds of vegetable slices she’s managed to score during her lifetime.

Lady perched

“I’m up all night to get lucky.”

5. You don’t know everything

Perhaps the most intriguing lesson I’ve learned from Lady is the art of accepting myself. She will never understand algebra, the intricacies of fine art, or the wonders of chemistry.

But I know what those things mean, and only I know what she’s missing out on. Lady, though? She’s content licking her privates and hounding me when I open the refrigerator.

That’s taught me that there are levels to living. Maybe I think I’m much smarter than her, but what other planes of consciousness are there? And how much more am I unable to perceive?

For all I know, an all-knowing being exists on another plane, looking at me like I’m an idiot for not understanding their equivalent of fine arts (or whatever they have on that level of existence). And I wouldn’t be able to grasp it, no matter how hard I try.

It’s given me peace to accept the level I’m operating on. To not bark up the wrong tree (heh) in trying to understand the meaning of life.

Lady and my partner Len

The women of my life

Not all learning takes place in the classroom

It’s interesting to notice the person I’ve become after having Lady as a companion. Before this, I couldn’t imagine myself caring for others—let alone beings who are totally dependent on me.

But here I am, a sucker for doggos now, learning all I can from this sometimes-dumb furry who barks at traffic cones for no reason.

Yet, I’ve come to love Lady for who she is. And despite her not being able to understand why I stare at a bright screen for hours a day, she still knows what it’s like to love.

Maybe that’s how we can bridge the gap between the different planes of existence. Maybe I won’t ever understand the algebra of the enlightened world, but I do know love. And I’m sure they do too.

And perhaps love is the answer after all. Or maybe I’m just overthinking this thing with my dog.

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73 thoughts on “Whoa, My Dog Is Teaching Me The Meaning Of Life”

  4. Hi Stuart,
    I had wanted to leave a note when I first read this post then life happened… I certainly could relate to what you had said about how we could learn a few things from our dogs. You post landed just about the time I had been thinking about how simple life appeared to be for Holly, our dog, a mongrel , playful, instinctive, knows what matters to her and always live in the moment. What a delightful post, thanks!

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    • Regarding the ‘simple’ life of dogs, I always wonder if there’s another layer of consciousness that is the equivalent between us and dogs. And if there is, perhaps I shouldn’t take life so seriously. Then again, all this is hyperbole, lol. Might as well make the most out of my day regardless, amirite?

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  5. Just love your Lady, who is sooooooo cute. She is such a delight to look at. I wish humans are as cute and lovable and forgiving and spontaneous and loyal and optimistic like dogs, but I know I am wishing too much. LOL. Haha, and you were offering her an apple? That’s so cute. I have a friend who feeds her dog chocolate and ice cream even if her vet told her not to. It is not that she offers, but rather the dog wants to eat whatever she eats and she doesn’t have the heart to refuse…

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    • Lol nah I didn’t give her the apple. It was just to demonstrate how Lady is so focused on all things food. Wouldn’t dare give her chocolate, since that’d be dangerous. Berries, onions, and avocado are not allowed either. Yet, she won’t go anywhere else even after I’m done eating, lol. Thanks for stopping by!

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  6. What a sweet girl you have…and so wise, too! I’ve learned so very much from my pets through the years. You illustrated her teachings wonderfully! 💞💞💞

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  7. I love you’re positive approach to life and your creativity in writing. It’s so good to hear about your relationship with Lady who clearly helps you to think through your ideas and figure out where your life is going! This story offers do much food for thought and I’m planning to come back to this post and read it again for inspiration.

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  9. This is a nice post.

    I don’t have a pet in that sense.
    I mean, in the family…in this home, yes…
    …but I’m not the one taking them to the vet or buying them food or anything like that.

    So, I don’t really feel anything deeply personal towards them.

    If there is any update on myself,
    I did read up a bit…like a news about a person on Instagram who simply posts about himself, and suddenly got offers for modeling and stuff. So, with the money…he doesn’t need to reply on financial support from his parents.

    Based on that, I do have a thought…of adding my name to the ‘About Me’ section of my profile. The username/nickname with the word ‘Joker’ stays.
    Ya know, to be known at least…rather than people only reading my posts but have completely no idea about who I am…not even a little.
    I guess my own picture and name would suffice.

    Anything else, is that next Sunday, June 11th 2023…is this year’s Latin American Festival.
    I went there last year…and going again this year.
    I managed to apply for a leave, even if it is just for one day.

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    • Oh wow, it’s been a year already! I remember you shared your experience of going to the Latin American Festival last year.

      Anyhoo, great to see that you’re still on the blog, and that you’re keeping it going by adding the About Me section. It’s true, a lot depends on digital presence these days. If not for the clout, then at least for the possible opportunities that may come from being findable.

      Long time since I saw you, so it’s great that you decided to visit!

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  14. My puppy’s been teaching me too! One thing she’s taught me is how much being human is being an animal. Like, for all our complicated ideas about friendship, love, decency, communication, she can do so much of it better than any human I know. We just do it with more words

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    • Yep! In many ways, our needs are all the same. It’s just that we’ve added so many complexities to living due to our ‘intelligence’, and it’s great to realise through pets that the requirements of life are fairly simple, and universal.

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  16. Such a wise and meaningful post. I honestly think every kid should have these 3 fundamental experiences: play an instrument, play a sport, have a pet (and a little later, I’d advocate strongly for “learn another language”). Pets teach us so much if we just stop to notice, and clearly you did.
    Funnily enough, our 3rd house rabbit used to hold grudges! We’d occasionally go away for the weekend and when we returned he’d turn around when we approached and give us the cold shoulder! It never lasted too long, but it happened every time. On the other hand, my cats don’t know the meaning of grudge.

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    • Those three are great fundamentals indeed, all of which I didn’t have as a child, and only got to doing as an adult.

      Lol, a rabbit is the last creature I’d expect to hold grudges, especially when compared to cats, but I guess that’s a thing.

      Learning another language is an interesting one, especially since children do it without any effort, seemingly.

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  18. ‘But she’s taught me what passion is. I’ve always admired people who pursue their goals with a single-minded tenacity. And Lady’s the doggo version of that.’

    Now that is something I need to learn from Doggo, that tenacious, relentless tenacity.

    How to pursue my dreams in the appropriate way and makea good living out of it.

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    • I know, right? Sometimes, I remind myself that I can write as much as I want, but there’s only a 1% chance I’ll write a bestseller. Then I give up.

      But Lady has taught me that that 1% could someday be my biggest haul, lol.

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  22. Greetings from Saigon, Stuart. :) Not too far from you these days.

    Lady is adorable. Pets are perfect life coaches because each lives in the moment, trusts and goes for their loves, and nothing else. No self-consciousness because they are not self-aware LOL. No mental baggage or mental demons because they live in the now, not being aware of time.

    Ryan

    PS….I love that apple picture.

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    • Welcome to this part of the world!

      I do suspect that Lady has some demons with food sometimes though. She just turns into Ms Hyde whenever food’s involved.

      Hope you saunter over to Malaysia sometime during the trip!

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  23. A dog becomes a different dog when it’s been living a while with a different owner. And I’ll swear the rescued dogs I’ve taken on are grateful. They have been so much better behaved than the ones I brought up from puppies.

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    • Lol yeah the puppies prolly had a spoiled childhood, so they expect a certain lifestyle growing up. Lady is a rescue too, though she’s been taken in since she was younger. Maybe that explains why she’s a brat sometimes :P

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  25. We only got one dog from a shelter. She was named Lady, but if ever there was a misnamed pooch, it was her. Of course, with shelter animals, one doesn’t know about their past. She was good around people, but she wanted to harm other pets. It was not an easy situation.

    I’ve lived with dogs my entire life, and they’ve brought me enormous joy for many of the same reasons you mentioned. The unconditional love thing is what makes dogs the best.

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    • Always a tough thing to need to address a pet’s troubled history. Lady was adopted too, and she was always left out when it came feeding time, which is why I think she always gets uncontrollably anxious around food. Like she begs aggressively whenever there’s food around, and she’ll NEVER let up trying to reach a table or counter with food.

      But still, they make for the best companions, especially on the days when I’m home alone.

      As always, appreciate you stopping by, Pete!

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  26. Lesson number 4 hit me the most. Haha, this made me remember my Taffy- she doesn’t let any opportunity pass whenever I work in the kitchen as well! Her biggest price for that so far was …whole meat.

    Anyway, Lady is so so sweet and optimistic! Love her already 💙💙😊

    Ps. That woman is so pretty. Ackkkk💙😊

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    • Lol, if only we had the same optimism for low odds. We disqualify ourselves too quickly. And it’s a great thing to have our pets teach us that some tenacity can get us huge prizes, even if it’s a 1% thing.

      Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  27. She is so special! You are an exceptional Dad for her and it’s clear she loves you very much. We have three four-legged creatures in our home, Chloe, a seven-year-old female Tortie who we have had since she was 4 months old, Oscar, a nine-year-old dachshund/golden retriever mix (don’t ask, we don’t know how that happened) who we have had since he was 5, and Nottina, a thirteen-year-old female black cat who we have had for three years. Nottina, though she was the last to be adopted, is Alpha and rules the house. Even Oscar, who is always ravenous for just about anything, knows not to try to take Nottina’s treats because he knows she’ll beat him up if he tries. Nottina loves Oscar though, and attends to him if he’s sick, like from eating too much. We call her Nurse Nottina because she attends to anyone, cat, dog, or human if they aren’t feeling well. When I had COVID, she refused to go to the kitchen to be fed and my son had to bring her cat food and put it on my bed. I know Lady is probably also known as Nurse Lady. Pets are amazing, despite everything, they unconditionally love us and care for us when we need love and affection.

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    • Omg I love dachshunds. I’ve seen a few fluffy dachshunds, so I assume that they’re retriever mixes too. That’s so cool that the warmest creature in your house is a cat, lol.

      Lady isn’t so much a nurse as she is a garbage disposer. We can’t leave anything edible within reach.

      Pets are amazing indeed, and a great demonstration of unconditional love. She teaches me how to put love back into the world too.

      Anyway, thanks for stopping by!

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    • Oh yeah. It’s so cool to share the feeling of love with another non-human. Kinda makes me feel more connected with the world, in some way. Thanks for stopping by, Tanish!

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  30. “She doesn’t hold grudges or write lengthy posts about it on her blog.” That reminded me of the Disney Channel show my girls used to watch “Dog With A Blog”. Maybe you should teach Lady to write and she can take over for you. 😂

    Seriously, though—she’s beautiful and you’re right that animals can teach us so many valuable life lessons.

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  31. I had a Lady too Stu! She was a King Charles / cocker too. Eye candy and sweetness galore. I thought I would have to stuff her when she died, I loved her so much. Turns out I grieve as much as I love so each furry kid after, has gotten my full love and attention and I rarely look back. Lady, is a girl after my own heart. I work for food too, like all of mine. They are the best teachers for sure! Great Post as always my friend! 💞

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    • King Charleses are just the cutest. And yeah, I can only imagine what that loss would feel like, because Lady is getting on in her years so I’ve been mentally preparing myself for the inevitable. Thanks so much for sharing your lovely memories, Cindy!

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  32. Lady reminds me of our Border Collie/Beagle mix Cedar. He is also constantly in pursuit of food. The other day I was making a stir fry and he was lucky enough to munch up a stray shrimp that flew onto the floor; the odds of catching something tasty are higher when I’m cooking, maybe 1 in 20, hah!

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  33. First, I’ll be the first admitting that I certainly don’t feel as if I’m in any sort of a race when it comes to Lady being “content licking her privates and hounding me when I open the refrigerator.” However, Lady undoubtedly holds the crown for having the most grateful dog-loving owner.

    It cannot be said that I’ve ever had my eyes well up when reading about an animal and the person owned until today. There’s a first time for everything. 🥂

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    • And I’m equally moved that you decided to share how moved you were. It’s definitely a privilege to be able to touch emotions through writing, so you’ve given me a gift through your lovely comment :)

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