I tend to watch the days pass without doing anything, out of nothing but the sheer desire to not do anything. Public holidays would come and go, and it wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for me to come out of long weekends achieving fuck all.
Friends have recommended I schedule a mental checkup, but I think I’m more lazy than depressed. After seeing some of the things people go through, I’d say I’m pretty mentally sound, as far as I’m concerned.
Still, some of the analogies people have used to describe depression have struck a chord with me — such as feeling as though you have a constant hangover, or having a strong desire to hide from the world the same way a regular person might hide from a telemarketer — and I do wonder if my normal is different from other people’s.
And it’s from these analogies that I’ve come up with one of my own, so bear with me here while I assault your imagination with ill-researched gobbledygook.
You see, the world is a symphony, and we’re all the little notes in an impossibly long score. Some people might be born a G-minor, while others could be a C-sharp. I believe that the world lies in the centre of it all, humming at its own frequency.
So let’s say that all the bookworms are a D, and that Miley Cyrus fans are B-minors, and let’s also assume that there’s enough notes in this analogy to encompass the wide human spectrum.
Still with me? Let’s dive deeper into the rabbit hole.
So let’s say the world hums at G; it’s always been that way, and always will be. And people who were lucky enough to have been born as Gs would fit right in.
Then there are those who harmonise with the world, those who, when mixed with the note of the world, form a beautiful chord. Those are your Bs and Ds.
I believe that people are born through different circumstances in life, and that some are lucky enough to lead a fairly joyous life, while others fight for survival the moment they leave the womb.
So these people go through life finding ways to belong in this world, and some resort to video games, others, to drugs. One person might find that working out brings him two notes lower, while for another, it could be prayer.
These are just the lucky ones. I believe that many people live their whole lives being out of tune with the world, never once finding respite during their time here.
This is my reasoning for why some people will stop at nothing to achieve their goals, while others can’t bring themselves to brush their teeth.
So the next time you come across a stranger who thinks differently, or someone who’s made some bad decisions in their life, don’t be too quick to judge, and remember that we’re all just trying to find our way in this world.
And with this, I leave you a monologue from Rick and Morty:
“I have no doubt that you would be bored senseless by therapy, the same way I am bored when I brush my teeth and wipe my ass, because the thing about repairing, maintaining and cleaning is: it’s not an adventure. There’s no way to do it so wrong you might die. It’s just work. And the bottom line is: some people are okay going to work and some people, well some people would rather die. Each of us gets to choose.”