This is it. Another year has passed, which means it’s time for the New Year’s resolutions posts.
I thought of joining the fun, but then I realised how much I’ve yet to achieve for 2022. So for my final post of this year, I figured I’d reflect on my shortcomings instead of my hopes and dreams.
Because as Socrates said, an unexamined life is one not worth living. So let’s examine mine and we’ll see if I can cough up some lessons on how to make the most out of 2023.
1. Writing every day
I wrote almost every day in 2022, so I may as well call myself Stephen King and call it a year, am I right?
There’s only one problem: I didn’t produce anything worthwhile.
Sure, if you tally up my word count, it’ll probably be in the ballpark figure of two hefty novels. But all my efforts were diffused at best—a couple thousand in a random first chapter, a good chunk into the blog, and a bunch of other short stories I’d cranked out for random submissions.
I wrote a lot, but a few of those words ever saw the light of day. That’s like me practising my free throws without ever stepping foot on the basketball court.
To use a half-assed analogy, I have the sun (my ideas), and the magnifying glass (my hours), but I’m not combining them to start a fire, and that’s where I’m fizzling out (heh).
So yes, while I would say I stayed true to my writing goals, I’ll also admit that I didn’t exactly show up with a good follow-through.
Plan for 2023: I’m going back to basics. Start small and take on projects one at a time.
2. Excelling in fitness
The past year has been huge for my fitness, as I’ve fallen into an everyday workout routine. That, coupled with the reopening of BJJ gyms, has made the fittest I’ve ever been in my 40 years of living.
I’ve also adopted the ‘stimulate, not annihilate’ mantra, and that’s only stoked my vigour in fitness. The downside? I don’t follow any specific programme and can’t tell if I’m improving in any of my physical pursuits.
For instance, I’ve remained a blue belt in BJJ despite being in the sport for seven years now (most people would at least be a purple belt), I can’t lift heavy because I don’t lift enough, and I can’t run far because I never truly push myself.
I’m starting to notice a theme here, and it starts with an ‘L’ and ends with ‘ack of focus’.
Plan for 2023: I’m going to pick a routine or an anchor activity to get good at, such as a barbell programme or my grappling pursuits.
3. Growing the blog
According to Wayback Machine, I’ve garnered 2,000 new followers in 2022. And since you’re reading this now, I’m going to take this time to thank you for being part of the journey.
But this doesn’t change the fact that the blog is just a passion project, and it’s not something that contributes directly to my writing career.
Yet almost all my time goes into maintaining the site. It’s the perfect illustration of the 80/20 rule, only I’m doing 80% of the work for 20% of what contributes to my life goals.
That’s not to say that I’m going to stop blogging though. It’s just that I’ll have to prioritise what ‘real’ writing means to me.
Plan for 2023: Time to focus less on admin duties, even if that means a drop in traffic.
4. Not making friends
As far as introversion goes, I think I fall pretty low down the scale. In fact, if you asked me not to see another soul for the entire year, I most probably could. Unsurprisingly, I could count on one hand the number of times I fulfilled my social obligations for 2022.
That did come at a cost, though. I felt that each time I went out, my speaking abilities deteriorated further than the previous time I’d ventured outdoors. I can’t even hold small talk now without feeling like a Nokia 3210 in an iPhone world.
If I were to highlight my worst area in life for 2022, this would be it, alongside my lack of financial growth.
I’m not going to pretend like hermit-ing is cool and all, because no man is an island. And now that I think about it, all the best opportunities in my life had come through word of mouth. Friends. Friends of friends. The like.
Only once did my blog ever get me a job. And even that was short-lived. Which is why I’m hoping to take my life offline in 2023 and live a little.
Plan for 2023: Give back to the world what I wish I had more of. Interest.
5. Taking time for granted
As previously mentioned, we’re here at yet another end of the year. And for you, it may signify hope. But to me, it just highlights another year of mixed priorities and lukewarm execution.
I had 365 days to make the most out of, and still I managed to stay in place, not feeling any different than I had since the start of the year.
I blame my lack of gratitude and planning for that. Because when you have lacklustre planning, your days tend to follow suit. Which leads to months, and years of just drifting.
Without a proper direction, it was so easy for me to squander each pocket of free time. Most of that time was spent on frivolities that didn’t contribute to my life, such as scrolling through social media or watching another rerun of Friends.
I feel like I could’ve easily avoided this problem had I had my life goals laid out before me, with very actionable tasks listed clearly on paper.
Plan for 2023: Dump my hobby-collecting tendencies and focus on doing less, but better.
Getting better at goal-setting
Thanks to my less-than-ideal 2022, I’ve learned that proper goal-setting involves a few particular points.
a. Be specific. Not only do my goals need to be detailed (e.g. finish Novel Number Two, minimum 80,000 words, within three months), but so too should my tasks (write 900 words a day specifically for Novel Number Two).
b. Improve on the good things. I’m already doing a couple of things right, so it pays to build upon the things that are working for me. All my wins should be improved further so that the benefits keep snowballing.
c. Know my flaws. It’s okay to fail or slack off. I’m human, after all. But I should always note the reasons why. This will prevent me from repeating the same mistakes and wasting another year.
Most importantly, I should remember that I can’t do everything. I can’t grow the blog while maintaining a decent output for the novel. And I can’t lift weights without sacrificing BJJ time. Knowing this will allow me to make the best decisions based on my finite daily energy.
The final say
Just because I’m writing, exercising, and learning every day doesn’t mean that I’m progressing toward my life goals.
The unexamined life is not worth living, they say? I say that the examined life not acted upon that’s the biggest waste.
So yeah. That’s all I have for today. Enjoy the rest of 2022 and have a happy New Year!
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Stuart Danker 
I’d love to hear your thoughts!